Crystal City

[NikNik]

Welcome to page 2  

Wow, now that's what I call an intrigueing start!

Jsut want to know how Alex come from his home planet into the hyperion? Maybe I should follow the CJ at ST, but I do not go there often anymore.

Looking forward to coming updates.

Enjoy the weekend.

Nik-Nik

[emilin]

Very cool pictures. Don't have time to get myself updated on the story just now (I will later of course) but the stone houses in the snow are really sweet.

[Cali]

wasnt this cj on st?, anyways, Ilove it!, very creative, and that spaceship is awesome. and i agree with emilin, those stone structures are great

[football_fever]

My apologies for a couple of the pictures in the last update.  The ones with the shadow of the ship passing over the ruins were from when I first started the story, and were much, much lower quality than I am capable of.  I updated the first few updates about a month ago, but a few of the crappy pictures that are left are ones that I wasn't able to get to at the time...sorry about that.  There might still be a chance.  Just ignore the fact that the ship looks completely different in this update than it did before....

NikNik:  believe it or not, in 4 months of updating this story, you're the first person to ask how they got in the ship in the first place.  Unfortunately, it won't be answered for quite some time.  But as you'll see in the next update, the past will be told in flashbacks starting a week before Earth is destroyed.

emilin: As long as you get caught up while it's still at 2 pages instead of 11 over at ST.  Long CJs can get discouraging.  Thanks for visiting.

Cali:  Yes it was, and I'm still updating it over there.  I'm getting into some complicated stuff, and it's much easier to transpose an update from there to here than it is to make a completely new update.  Thanks for the compliments



Chapter 3 - Should I Stay or Should I Go?

Nick Lamont
-Present Day


My name is Nick Lamont

Recently I've survived crashing into an alien planet, a near miss with an asteroid, hijacking
an alien spacecraft, a plane crash, and directly before that, a shootout in an airport.
I don't know why I've survived this long, but I did.  And I'm looking at things quite differently
than I did before.  There is something here that needs to be done.  And I'm going to find out what
that is if it kills me.



David:  Liz and I are going back down to the ship.  Any requests for things to look for?

Theresa: See if you can find any cigarettes

David: Yeah...it's at the top of the priorities.  Right above "more water"



We've been getting along pretty well for the last few days.  We were still in our little cave in the
castle.  I'd been trying to convince them to leave, but without a direction to go, or a goal to go after,
my argument was useless.  But that was until today.  Today...things change.


Everyone was in their normal places.  Alex and Allison were talking in the corner, Delsa was cleaning the
same spot she'd cleaned 50 times before, David and Liz were reading or writing something, Theresa was pacing
and on edge from having nothing to smoke. 

Theresa heard it first.  It started as a subtle hum, as if someone's cell phone was vibrating.  It gradually
became louder...and louder...Theresa was the first to notice.


Theresa: Do you hear that?

Greg: yeah, what is it?

Alex: Are they back?

Nick: I don't think so.  This sounds different.


I poked my head out of the hole.  It was apporaching fast.  Delsa's head appeared next to mine.


Delsa:  Oh my...

Nick: We should go back inside


The engines roared as it zoomed overhead




Nick: That was definitely not our enemy.  We need to go in that diection

Liz: It's not our enemy, but how do we know they're friendy?

Alex: We have to try.  At least we know there's life.  We can't just stay here.



It was good having him on my side.  The others seemed to listen to him more, even though
he got his advice from me 90% of the time.  Liz and Alex continued to argue



Liz: ok, so even if we went, how do we know if that ship was on its way home or to some place?

Alex: We don't know that.  But even if it was going somewhere else, there would be someone there
      regardless.


Nick: How about we vote on it?  All in favor of following that ship that might not be an enemy
      and probably has fresh food and water, raise your right hand.  All those in favor of
      staying here and slowly starving to death while we figure out who we're going to eat first,
      raise your left hand.

Liz: You put it so nicely...


We packed what we could and left our shelter.  We hadn't gone far when we reached our first obstacle




Greg: wow, this is nice.  I always wanted to go to the grand canyon...I just figured I'd be on Earth when I did

Liz: we should definitely not have left.  how are we going to cross this?

Allison: How about we climb?


She started to climb down the steep cliff


Alex: hmm..seems like a good plan to me...


Just as Alex started climbing down we heard the hum again.


Nick: guys, wait.


There in the distance a familiar shape appeared...only there were two of them now.
They stopped above the valley we were about to enter and hovered for about a minute.

what were they doing?

as soon as I thought that, they lowered themselved over two massive crystals sticking out of the snow.



Alex: allison, don't move

We were still hidden from their view...it seemed.

They sat on the crystals for a couple minutes before taking off.





They flew near us, but turned away to fly the way they came.


David:  I wonder what that was all about?

Nick:  I don't know, but it solves the question about which way to travel.


We all started climbing down the cliffs into the canyon and continued our journey across the snowy terrain...

[bat]

Great update and wonderful snow pictures!

[Cali]

those are some big crystals..great work

[petercintn]

Very interesting.  From the frying pan to the fire so to speak.  Bated breath while waiting for more.  Whatever that means.    Good story! 

[football_fever]

Ok, so some of my pics aren't showing up over at ST, so updating should be a little faster.  I'm posting the photos on photobucket under my account (they were just random pics at imageshack before) so now they won't disappear, and I'll have the entire update coded for image posting and everything...just copy and paste.  Wheee!



bat: thank you!  Everyone loves the snow pictures haha

Cali: Yes, massive crystals indeed.  I have big plans for them that I haven't gotten to on ST

petercintn: I was trying to think of a clever reply, but I can't, and will just post the update instead.


This is the first of many flashbacks.  It helps fill in the story to let you know where the characters are coming from, "Lost" style.  Just let me know if it gets too confusing...I don't want any of my readers to be "lost"





Nick Lamont
6 days before the end of the world
Atlantic Ocean





Nick: Hey...the plane just left Paris...yeah, I have it...
                   they were taken care of...see you at the gate


Most people go to Paris to see the Eiffel Tower and The Louvre, others might go to visit friends or family.  Then there is the rare person that goes to steal priceless paintings.  Out of this rare group, most of them aren't successful.  I guess that makes me very special.

Some people might consider me a bad person.  OK, most people would consider me a bad person.  But to my credit, most of the people that know I'm a bad person aren't alive for very long.  So I am a good person...in a tree-falling-in-the-woods-no-one-around-to-hear-it sort of way.

It's a long flight from Paris to Alamosa.  Even with dinner and sleeping, there was a lot of awake time to spend thinking about what I'd done.

Captain: Ladies and gen..lemen, this is your cap......peaking.  Just letting you know.......arriving in approx......20 minutes.  Thank you for fly......Anga Airways.

some passengers looked wearily to one another.  That much static wasn't normal.  Makes you wonder what else is wrong with the plane.





Robbie met me at the airport.  What I saw made my mouth drop.  He was holding a sign that said "Prince Henry."


Nick: what the **** do you think you're doing!

Robbie: It's a joke


I slammed him against the wall


Nick: How do like this joke, you idiot?  Do you have any idea how many people are looking for any kind of clue as to where the painting went?

I held the sign up to him

Nick: does this look anything like a clue to you?

I slammed it in a garbage can and walked away.



Walking out of the main doors I saw a familiar black Lexus: my frequent employer Andreas.






Andreas: Nicholas...come va?

Nick: bene

Andreas: good. don't say another word until we get to Mario's





The best Italian food in Alamosa was at Mario's.  It was also the place people went to talk about "business" without being disturbed.  If anyone asks, you were never there.

Mario put us in Andreas's private booth.

Andreas: so...how did it go

Nick: without a hitch

Andreas: that's my boy.  Where is the painting now?

Nick: it's on it's way.  I sent it to myself using Ibella express.

Ibella was a large oil company with a major refinery in Alamosa docks.  The refinery was owned by the cousin of the a boss that owned the Neyorka Bay Casino in Las Vegas. He was known for smuggling goods from overseas on his tankers for quite a profit.

Andreas: how much is that going to cost?

Nick: $15,000.  Don't worry, it's coming out of my cut.

Andreas: good.  very good.  you're sure the rest of the team is taken care of?

Nick: you know the answer to that question

Andreas: I do.  But I want to hear it from your mouth.

Nick: Yes.  They're all dead

Andreas: here's what you're going to do...this is the biggest heist we've done.  You're going to lay extra low for the next few weeks.  I have a room for you at the Atlantic Plaza Hotel down the street.  You don't do anything until I say so, is that understood?  You leave the room only if it's absolutely neccesary, you do not spend the money, you do not speed, you do not change lanes without using your blinker.  No police attention.  If I hear about anything...


He let the sentence hang.  He didn't have to finish it.

Andreas: When does the package come?

Nick: Next Wednesday at the latest

Andreas: Here is your keycard...I will see you Thursday




Front Desk: Good afternoon Mr. Kessler would you like a bellman to help with your belongings?

Nick: I'm fine...thanks.

I set my luggage on the floor and sat on the bed thinking about what Andreas told me.  Then I stood up and walked out the door

[dedgren]

f_f- hey, lots of hard work here.

I have to tell you, I'm a hard sell with story MDs/CJs.  Either the story needs to be a real "grabber," or the pics have to provide a compelling focus.  While I like what you've done here when I go through the whole thing all at once (like I did today), individual updates like your last one don't really leave me completely satisfied (although, again, when I read it at the end of reading the whole thing, it worked much better).

A couple of suggestions.

1)  Maybe try more pics, perhaps varied size (the uniform 800x600 size seems kind of clunky)- you might even think about some side-by-side pics and text done with tables (PM my if you want some info on how to do this).  I guess I'm saying break things up a bit, and make the pics interesting in and of themselves.

2)  I'd really suggest condensing your text.  Make the font size smaller, and compress things by using a more "novel-like" format.  Now, almost every line starts in a new paragraph, and you sometimes have the reader looking at screenfulls of text.

Anyway, I'm being a critic because, at bottom, I'm a fan, and really would like to see this go the places that it could.  I know you care a lot about what you're doing- replacing the flawed pics told me a great deal.

Let me know if there's anything I can do to help you out.


David

[petercintn]

Nice airport.  Think I'll dl that and take some pointers.  As always, I'm waiting in suspense to see what happens.

[football_fever]

Wow, only 2 replies?  I'm not used to that...(edit:  now that I look back, I had 2 replies before this update at ST as well...weird)



Dedgren:  Thanks for the pointers.  I was curious as to how to why my font was huge.  Consider it fixed.  As for the rest of it, it gets much better in just a few updates.  I could completely rework the first 10 updates, but that would involve so much rewriting...that's where plot holes come in.  I've successfully avoided them so far.  haha

petercintn: Unfortunately I try to end each update with a cliffhanger, so you might be waiting in suspense for some time...haha




Delsa Vega
-69 days after the end of the world


Most people in my situation wouldn't consider themselves lucky.  I am one of the last eight people
alive from Earth, everyone I know is dead, I'm stranded on a strange planet covered in ice, and running
from an unknown enemy that destroyed Earth.

I guess I can't help being an optimist when I think of the fact that I am still alive, and although my job
wasn't a pretty one...at least I have comfortable shoes...



Greg: Wow, this was a great idea.  I love that we left our shelter to pursue a ship that may or may not be
      friendly.  It's really good that we're walking in this bitter cold...that cave...it was a little too
      warm and cozy, you know?


Liz: With all the hot air coming out of your mouth, we should be able to stay plenty warm


The rest of the group smiled.  Greg had been talking non-stop since leaving the cave





Greg: Man, look at this...first I get to see the grand canyon, and now Mt. Everest?  I love this sightseeing tour!


Liz: That's it...


Liz threw him into the snow and punched him in the mouth


Liz: you need to shut up!  I'm sick of hearing your voice!  I hope it hurts to talk now

Greg: that didn't hurt...


he sounded shocked


Greg: ...guys...that didn't hurt...

Alex: I'm sure it didn't, Greg.  Seriously, stop talking.


Liz was a tough girl.  No one knew what she did before all this happened, but she was the one person that was able to
fly the Hyperion.


Nick: Stop all that horsing around.  We need to keep moving.

Greg: what about Mt Everest here in our way?

Nick: we handle it the same as all the others.  We go around it. Simple



Delsa Vega
-71 days after the end of the world


We have been walking for 3 days.  There was no end in sight.  We hiked to the top of a small hill, and there were mountains
as far as the eye could see.  We had kept warm at night by hollowing piles of snow into shelters.  It was some sort of survival thing
Liz knew.  We prepared to leave the small valley we stayed in for the night.





Theresa: I'm not feeling good at all...we should stay here

Nick: We've gone too far to stop.  For all we know, civilization could be on the other side of that mountain

Allison: What if it's not?  We'll still be in the middle of nowhere

Delsa: What if it is?

Allison: It won't be, Delsa, there's nothing out here.


Allison had been challenging everything Nick said.  If it wasn't for Alex supporting Nick, she wouldn't listen to him at all



Alex: let's just keep moving...if we stay here, we'll die.  If we go out and there's nothing there, we die.  If we go out and there
      is something there...we live.  Going out there is the only possibility of surviving


Very well put.  Alex could be very eloquent when he needed to be.  Nick nodded to him with approval
Allison was not pleased Alex had sided with Nick again, but everyone knew he was right.  We began to gather our supplies and head out




Delsa Vega
-74 days after the end of the world




We have now been walking for 5 days.  We have seen nothing.  Nothing but snow.  Occasionally we saw a large Crystal sticking out of the snow.
I found a small one that I was carrying with me.  The group was tired and cold.  We were moving slower than ever.  Somehow I was in the front,
directing where we went.  It was now mindless walking.  No one talked.  We knew we were going to die here.




Delsa: We should climb one of those hills at the end of this clearing to see if we can see something


There was no response.  The group continued to walk silently.  The clearing was bigger than I thought.  It felt like we'd never
reach the other side.  Even I was beggining to trudge through the snow.  Theresa collapsed.

Alex: is she ok?

David: She's barely breathing.  There's nothing we can do for her


David was a doctor before all this happened.  It didn't look good.


Delsa: should we take her with us?

Nick: we can put her on one of the food sleds.


We began to walk further through the field.  None of us looked healthy.  Greg collapsed a short time later.  Alex, who was pulling a
sled with food and Theresa on it fell to the snow a few feet from him.  We were all so tired.  We were all about to die in this field
My vision was blurred.  I looked to my left and saw Allison on the ground.  I looked to my right in time to see Liz fall to the ground.

This was it...

The wind stirred snow into my face.  Ice fell from my coat from the intense vibration.  Wind...vibration...not natural...I looked up...
through my blurry freezing eyes I could barely make out the last thing I thought I'd ever see





and then everything was black....

[beskhu3epnm]

Heh heh,

Yes F_F, 30 pages is a tad much, so I will kick back and enjoy this once again! I can't help but notice the work you've managed to do on the mountainous terrain. Great work... I could definitely learn a thing or two from it! Also, the story is (and always has been) the best reason to read this MD.

[Heinz]

great story you have going, pal. the 30 pages to read through seems daunting. lol maybe if i had more time... would love to follow this from now on. see you

[football_fever]

Sorry about the lack of updates here.  I'd been working on chapter 19 of the story as it stands over at ST, and although it takes little effort to transfer old updates here, I've been too busy to do so.  I do want to hurry up and get the story up to date here though.  We're almost to the meat of the story...don't worry.  Think of the first 10 chapters like Star Wars Episodes I and II.  All they're really there for is to set up Episode III.  And if you weren't around for the first two, you probably wouldn't care as much about the third...[/rambling]




beskhu3epnm:  Hello, my friend.  Glad to see you here at sc4d.  I'm only at 13 pages over at ST, which is much better than 30...

And I don't know about the talk of you learning things about terraforming from me...pretty much all my maps are yours or someone else from NHP...excluding the few that are hand-terraformed and contain minimal detail...like this one.

zniehadajet:  Thank you for the compliment!  I'm sure you'll like the story much better once it gets rolling.  See you around


Everyone:  I know there aren't many pictures in this update, but it is rather short and depressing compared to the rest of the story.  Next update things get much better...I promise

Chapter 6 - Things Could Be Worse


Delsa Vega
-6 Days Before the End of the World

Delsa: Housekeeping, this is Delsa...

Guest: hi, my sheets are dirty. I need someone to change them now, please

Delsa: I'm very sorry, Mr. Kessler, I will send someone right away

*click*


Another rich person not happy with their room.  This is my life.  In charge of keeping a hotel clean that I would never be able to afford to stay in.  But at least I'm here.  At least I have a job.  It could be worse.  I could be unable to support my three kids.  And I make more than the people I'm in charge of.  Things could be worse.




Anyone that knows me would tell you I keep a positive outlook on life.  No matter what happens, things could be worse.  Crabby celebrities? Could be worse. Crappy job? Could be worse.

Today...things are about to get a lot worse.


Delsa: housekeeping this is Delsa

Operator: Delsa, your sister just called.  She would like you to call her immediately

Delsa: Thank you


My sister never calls me at work.  I had a sinking feeling in my chest.  I almost didn't want to call her.


Delsa: Gabriella, is something wrong?

Gabriella: Delsa...it's mom...she's in the hospital...it's...not good....


She was fighting tears on the phone.  I put someone else in charge and left for the hospital.



Delsa: Traffic..no!  hurry up!

Tears began to fill my eyes.  This stupid Alamosa traffic was going to make me miss the last moments of my mother's life.


Delsa: please go faster...please...


I turned on the radio to help distract me from my frustration

Static.  Nothing but static on three different stations.

Finally a station. News, but at least it was something


Radio: ....on the run.  Authorities in Paris are still searching for leads on the dissapearance of the Prince Henry painting from the Four Seasons Mall.  Investigators are baffled by how the thiefs stole the painting, and even more puzzling are the four bodies found in a nearby metro station believed to be the thieves themselves.  All flights between....


Depressing news on the radio, depressing news in real life...things could be worse...somehow.




My worst fear had come true.  When I got to the hospital, my mother had died.  My brother and sisters were standing around her bed.  My brother Octavio told me she was not awake while they were here, but it did not help me get over the fact that I did not see her before she died.




I arrived at my house around 1am.  My two oldest children were still awake

Delsa: Why are you still awake?  You have school tomorrow

Armando: Something happened to abuela?

Delsa: Yes, honey, she died today.

Julio: What is going to happen?

Delsa: tomorrow after school, we're going to San Verona to see the rest of the family.

Julio: and then what?

Delsa: I don't know sweetie...just try to get some rest.


The two boys went to their rooms.  I stayed in the living room and sat on the couch.  It seemed like there were so many bad things happening.  Not just here, but everywhere.  How was I supposed to be positive?  Of course I was going to San Verona, and I was going to see family I hadn't seen in awhile...but my mother was dead, and I didn't know what to tell my children about it.  This was their first experience with the subject.

The TV turned to static.  Great, now I need to get the TV fixed.

It felt like I was surrounded with bad news.  I had no idea how true that was about to be

[Fledder200]

looks good as always football!!



i need some more, i'm hooked

[Fred_Ginger]

Football, I'm still here.  Just waiting until you get to the parts I haven't seen before!

[dedgren]

...depressing...

Well, nailed that one...

btw, what program is the orangy-looking city pic in?  SC5?

See you next update.


David

[threestooges]

-David: If I recall correctly, that "orangy pic" is a shot of "Los Santos" (a.k.a. Los Angeles) from Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas.

Regardless of where it came from, it fits very well (and hopefully SC5 would look like that...but then my computer wouldn't be able to handle it...). The story as a whole is a great read. Star Wars I & II may have been to set up III but they were still interesting and enjoyable. I'll look forward to the next installment of what has already shaped up to be a great read. Thank you for taking the time to put together such a detailed story.

[Cali]

wow, this is really getting good

[Fred_Ginger]

... still waiting...